So I fly back to the states roughly twice a year, and customs/immigration provide varying levels of irritation/amusement. I’ve entered O’Hare international about four times, and the setup was a bit different each time I did it. There’s always passport clearance, then baggage claim, then customs, then sliding doors, and the outside. One time however, there was a standard blue-uniformed (not TSA) police officer between customs and the sliding door, asking each passenger random questions before they exited. I overheard him asking the suit in front of me something about the length of her stay and something about a conference, and I step up. I had been traveling for >12 hours at this point, and all his questions were rapid-fire, which I can’t sufficiently simulate syntactically. The exchange went thusly:
[Cop]: Where are you flying in from?
[Cop]: What were you doing there?
[Me]: I work at a Lab.
[Cop]: What kind of lab?
[Me]: I study Physics.
[Cop]: High-Energy Particle?
[Me]: …. Uh. Yes.
[Cop]: Do you make quarks?
[Me]: ….. Uh… not me personally… the machine group provides–
[Cop]: But you work with quarks?
[Cop]: Which is the worst quark?
[Cop, Sounding Annoyed and Busy]: Yes, which is the worst. Down, strange, which is the worst?
[Me]: ….Uh, top… I guess…
At this point he looks at me like he’s about to check-raise me, sort of smacks my passport against my chest and says
[Cop]: That’s what I thought. NEXT!
I wander into the Chicago winter, and only really remember the exchange after a few hours. He probably did that every time someone working at TeVatron went through, but I was way too tired to be prepared for that.